Beating Imposter Syndrome with Faith Rumer

Jenn: 00:00:03

Welcome to Virtual Summit Success.

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I'm Jenn, founder of Virtual Summit Search, and you're in the right place

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if you want to make the most of your virtual summit experience, whether

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you're a host or virtual summit speaker.

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Let's get going with your next step to virtual summit success.

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In this snippet from a Sell With a Summit: Speaker Edition session, Faith

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is talking about imposter syndrome.

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I've felt it, you've felt it, but we can work past it to take on our

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summit speaking - and our business in general - with confidence.

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I'll let Faith take it away though and tell you more!

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I am excited to introduce you to the wonderful Faith Rumer, founder of

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Raise My Impact and coach of Grammy and Academy Award winning performers.

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Thank you so much for being here, Faith!

Faith Rumer: 00:00:42

Oh, I am really excited.

Jenn: 00:00:44

Alright, so I know that you've got some stuff prepared for us, so feel

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free to just go ahead and jump right in!

Faith Rumer: 00:00:51

Okay.

Faith Rumer: 00:00:51

So I'm Faith Rumer, as Jenn said, and I am passionate about helping creatives

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and leaders share their message with confidence and authentically connect with

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their audience and powerfully express themselves so that they can get their

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passion out into the world and create a bigger impact and make a difference.

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So welcome to this workshop, Share Your Message Confidently: Engage

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Your Audience with Impact and Ease and Grow Your Business Now.

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I want to start by asking you a really simple question: what would your life

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look like if you had the confidence and the certainty to fully get your

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gifts and talents out into the world?

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Now, just imagine if that were true.

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You could be making a real difference in your own life, your community,

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your family, and even the world.

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You'd be speaking and presenting your message with power and

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impact and truly connecting with your audience every single time.

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You'd be creating success in the world as a creative professional

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or a leader or a speaker.

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Now, so many people have a voice inside their head that constantly tells them

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- I mean, constantly tells them - that they're not doing a good enough job.

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It's called your Inner Critic.

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And it's the voice of the teacher or your parent or marketing that told

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us that we're not doing it right or that we'll never be good enough.

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And one of the major things that really feeds your inner critic is

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what we call imposter syndrome.

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And imposter syndrome is that idea that you don't deserve your success,

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that you're an imposter, a fake, and you don't really deserve to be

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in the position you're in, that the real you is just not good enough.

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So let's dig into imposter syndrome.

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Let's check this out.

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Imposter syndrome is destructive and it's painful.

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First of all, why?

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Because it keeps us from doing our work that we came here to do and then it keeps

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us from helping the very people that need to hear our message or be helped

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by our process or our information, but imposter syndrome is just another lie

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that we tell ourselves to try and protect ourselves from being embarrassed or being

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judged, and no one wants to feel the way.

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No one wants to be embarrassed and no one wants to feel judged.

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Now, it's really great to have something to work with to help fix

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this 'cause it's not going to go away on itself, it's just there.

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So I developed this process called the Call Out the Lie process, and

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the first step is that you're going to identify some negative imposter

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lies, self-talk that you have.

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For example, I might think as I was creating my courses, or you might

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think as you're trying to create, you know, something or speak at a summit,

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"I don't know what I'm talking about."

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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"I don't know what I'm talking about."

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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So the second step is to call out the lie and you're going to call BS on it.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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You're going to call it out loud and you're going to say "that's a lie!"

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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Let yourself feel the lie you've been telling yourself and get passionate.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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Say the words louder.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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"I don't know what I'm talking about.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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That's total BS!

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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I am not accepting that."

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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Now the third step is to replace the lie with the truth.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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Well, you probably don't want to use that very similar wording or flip the

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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sentence from negative to positive because when you try to replace, "I don't know

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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what I'm talking about" with, "I know what I'm talking about," it might not

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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work because your brain or your body or your psyche just may not believe that.

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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So instead of "I know what I'm talking about," I can say, "my knowledge and

So you say the words, the lie out loud:

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my expertise can really help people."

Now say it several times: 00:04:46

"my knowledge and my expertise can really help people."

Now say it several times: 00:04:50

That's a truth I can get behind!

Now say it several times: 00:04:53

And the fourth step is to add a word of encouragement so

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that you can take some action.

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And I would say, "I can do this.

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I can really help people.

Now say it several times: 00:05:03

I can do this.

Now say it several times: 00:05:04

I can get out there and help people."

Now say it several times: 00:05:06

So it would look like, first of all, number one: "I don't

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know what I'm talking about."

Then I call it out: 00:05:11

"That's a lie!

Then I call it out: 00:05:14

That's total BS.

Then I call it out: 00:05:15

I'm not accepting that."

I change it to the truth: 00:05:17

"My expertise and my knowledge can really help someone."

I change it to the truth: 00:05:23

And then I say, "I can do this.

I change it to the truth: 00:05:26

I can really help people."

I change it to the truth: 00:05:29

How does that sound?

Jenn: 00:05:30

I love that process, especially 'cause when you say it out loud, it's a

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lot easier to recognize that no one else is going to say that about you out loud

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because they don't believe it either.

Faith Rumer: 00:05:42

Yeah.

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So true.

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You think that people are saying that about you, but

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you're saying it about yourself.

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So call out the lie, and then let yourself believe what's really true.

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Our expertise and our knowledge can really help people.

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Yeah, I love that sentence, too.

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That's perfect.

Faith Rumer: 00:06:01

So once you find the root of your imposter syndrome and you work

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past that, it can still be hard to build some of your confidence as a speaker.

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So after working with thousands of actors and speakers and entrepreneurs and

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all of these people, I discovered that there are three pillars of confidence

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and that these three pillars build your confidence, but they're also

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necessary to help sustain your confidence because sometimes we'll work on one

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and then we go, "what's happening?

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I don't understand why I'm not confident anymore," because we need to make sure

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that all three of these are working.

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The first pillar is the body.

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And we need to ground ourselves and our energy and our body, because that

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creates a foundation for our confidence and the ability to express ourselves

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powerfully and to speak authentically.

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When you get nervous and your energy is all over the place and you're up in

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your head and you're judging yourself?

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I help my clients release that excess destructive tension and get them out of

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the head and then back into the body.

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So their body works to support their voice and their expression,

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and also their visual impact.

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That builds their confidence so then they can create greater impact when

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they share their message, and they connect with their audience in a more

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authentically and spontaneous way.

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The second pillar to our confidence is the mind.

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And this is where imposter syndrome can really sabotage.

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You want to remember that our thoughts create what we experience

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and there are no neutral thoughts.

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So first, you want to identify, what are your negative thoughts and release them.

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You cultivate more empowering thoughts, and then you shift

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your energy - that shifts your energy - and then rinse and repeat.

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Now, there are many great processes that I use with my clients to

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create more empowering thoughts, and they're not complicated - they

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shouldn't be complicated - but simple ways to create empowering thoughts

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that can really change our lives.

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What's most important is that we have something that helps us and that

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we're willing to use that process.

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And it's important to do this daily - rinse and repeat, just rinse and repeat.

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Okay, and the third pillar.

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Now this is our soul, our spirit, this is our why, it's your purpose.

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It's what is your intention when you speak or create a summit or

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design a program or even perform, if you were a creative artist.

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Your why moves you forward and it keeps you on course.

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A "why" can either empower us or move us off course and destroy our confidence.

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I just worked with a client and she was creating a video for her project,

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but she felt so uncomfortable and wasn't happy with when she looked

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at back at it, what she filmed.

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So we discovered that her why had become, "I want people to really like me."

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Of course, she was in her head and she got lost - she lost herself.

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Once we shifted her why to "I'm creating this video so all women can celebrate

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their own beauty," everything changed.

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It was so amazing to see the difference.

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So you might ask yourself, "how do I create confidence in my everyday life?"

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Well, it's not fake-it-til-you-make-it, 'cause some people say that,

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'cause that's not really true.

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It's about being who you are right now and sharing where you are right now

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and offering what you have right now.

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And working with those three pillars of confidence.

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Remember that every time we step out a little bigger, we're going to feel a

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little scared and a little nervous, but that's what we've been doing our whole.

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Think about all of the times that you had to step up in your life: getting

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an education, being a parent - if you're a parent - being a partner in a

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relationship, running your own business, even when you learned to drive a car.

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I remember that being pretty scary.

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Remember that it's okay to make a mistake; we're not something at first.

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And for me, willingness is my biggest ally.

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All you have to be as willing to put yourself out there.

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And even if things sometimes go wrong, it's okay.

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If you're willing and you don't give up, you're going to experience more

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success than you can even imagine.

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So we are always moving from where we are, from what we know, and from what

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our skillset is to where we want to be.

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And this is true for every successful person.

Jenn: 00:10:48

Awesome.

Jenn: 00:10:48

I'm so excited to be able to go through that, 'cause that, especially the process

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that you gave us, that is something that I know is going to help so many

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people, because having something tangible to do, rather than just keep getting

Jenn: 00:11:02

into your own mind is so important.

Faith Rumer: 00:11:05

Oh my gosh, yeah.

Faith Rumer: 00:11:07

Yeah.

Faith Rumer: 00:11:07

And there's a lot of ways we can work on our confidence, but that

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one really seems to work well.

Jenn: 00:11:13

Yeah, it's really great.

Jenn: 00:11:15

So I know that you have a free training to help us take this even further.

Jenn: 00:11:21

So can you tell us a little bit about that so that folks can go and check that out?

Faith Rumer: 00:11:25

Sure.

Faith Rumer: 00:11:26

Oh, I'm so happy, to, great.

Faith Rumer: 00:11:27

So I've given you this process, the same process that I've used with

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my successful clients, and you've got a couple of options, right now?

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We've broken it down so you can use this information to get rid of some imposter

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syndrome and gain some real confidence.

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You can come in and lean into this process even more with me and develop what you

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need to get to the next step and make a difference in your work and your passion.

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You just don't have to do this alone.

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So I'm inviting you to join me on my free live training - it's a 90-minute training

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- Raise Your Impact and Influence, where you're going to learn how to share your

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message with confidence, authentically connect with your audience, and powerfully

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express yourself and make a difference.

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Even if you don't think you're ready or lack confidence or feel like you're

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an imposter right now, this training is exactly where you want to be, because

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we're going to take care of that.

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So you want to register for your free training now, and here's

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the link to register for that.

Faith Rumer: 00:12:32

It's raisemyimpact.com/free-training.

I'll say it again:

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raisemyimpact.com/free-training.

I'll say it again:

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And you probably already know that you want to be on this training, because

I'll say it again:

: 00:12:47

we want to go a little bit deeper with us, but especially if you're tired

I'll say it again:

: 00:12:50

of waiting to commit fully to your dream career and your talents, and you

I'll say it again:

: 00:12:55

feel like you're not fulfilling your purpose in your life, and you just feel

I'll say it again:

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like you're surviving day to day, you really want to be on this training.

I'll say it again:

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And this training is really good for you if you know that you want to make a real

I'll say it again:

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difference in your own life and in your community, your family, and the world.

I'll say it again:

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You want to speak of present with confidence and power so that you

I'll say it again:

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can really inspire your audience.

I'll say it again:

: 00:13:19

And then you want to authentically connect with your audience so you can

I'll say it again:

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help them transform and get them to take some real action either within

I'll say it again:

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your business, or help them to get their business out into the world.

I'll say it again:

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And you want to go after your dream with awesome speaking confidence

I'll say it again:

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- we're going to call that a phrase, "awesome speaking confidence" - and

I'll say it again:

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create a life that you really love.

I'll say it again:

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And you're going to want to join me on this training and there's the link again.

I'll say it again:

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You can go ahead and read that.

Jenn: 00:13:47

Yep.

Jenn: 00:13:48

We'll have the link in the button down below too.

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I'm so excited for folks to get to go and take action on that with you, especially

Jenn: 00:13:55

since it's live training, like that's something that a lot of the times you're

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going onto a recorded webinar, and that's valuable, but it's so much more valuable

Jenn: 00:14:04

getting to go and do Q &A with Faith, so make sure you go click that button down

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below and sign up for that free training.

Faith Rumer: 00:14:13

All right, Jenn, thank you for having me here.

Faith Rumer: 00:14:15

This was really exciting.

Faith Rumer: 00:14:17

I know that virtual summit's really exciting.

Jenn: 00:14:20

Yeah.

Jenn: 00:14:21

Thank you so much for being here.

Jenn: 00:14:22

I'm really excited.

Jenn: 00:14:23

And if you have any questions for Faith, make sure to go and ask them

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in the community and let Faith know how it impacts your speaking and

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confidence, because that is the end goal with this, is to help you

Jenn: 00:14:37

get past your imposter syndrome and become a much more confident speaker.

Jenn: 00:14:41

So thank you again for joining us, Faith.

Faith Rumer: 00:14:43

Thanks so much, Jenn.

Jenn: 00:15:21

Thanks for listening to Virtual Summit Success.

Jenn: 00:15:23

Don't forget to leave a review and let others know your biggest

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summits there are, the more tips we'll have to share with you.

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